It is as I feared.
I prepared about 20,000 frenchmen, and about 20 regiments of rockets to go with them. Whilst I did this, the Ottomans declared war on Poland. Not wanting the significant force of the Ottomans attacking my Southern Austrian border, I decided to side with them.
My grand invasion army readied in ports across the English channel.
Without my knowledge, Prussia made peace with Poland.
My navy used rocket ships and Ironclads to wipe out the British fleet.
Without my knowledge, Prussia allied with Russia.
My armies landed in Ireland, Scotland, Wales and England simultaneously. After one month, Britain had been forced from it's homeland.
Without my knowledge, Poland, Prussia and Russia formed an alliance.
The armies in Britain were destroyed, and a rebellion in England was crushed. Britain was pacified.
Without my knowledge, The Prussians and Poles built a vast army in their power block, about six full stacks in total. I can only imagine how much it crippled their economy.
I began bringing the invasion army (plus another four chasseur regiments I'd recruited in Scotland) into England, sending them to the ports to return to France.
Prussia declares war on me. They're joined by Poland. Immediately, Prussia advances, besieging Berlin.
I use my vast treasury to conscript an army across Prussia, Germany, Austria and Western Russia. I use these troops to strengthen my borders.
Prussia's occupation of Berlin didn't last long. I bring one of my central European armies (based in Switzerland) North, retaking Berlin in a desperate snowy battle against the Prussian army. I easily win - the Prussians mainly used just Landwehr against my seasoned line infantry, to no effect.
With Berlin retaken, I began to look to my Eastern defences. Poland had begun advancing East (I have complete surveillance, due to my network of agents across their territory), so I bring my Russian army South.
This is where things start going wrong.
My army stationed in Russia enters Polish territory, comprising some three thousand men and cavalry (no artillery - whilst in Russia, artillery was useless, as to travel in Winter we had to move fast). They immediately make for Konigsberg, the only city of Poland (Previous Polish-Prussian wars had granted Prussia control over Warsaw, and Poland held Konigsberg). - I'd become arrogant with my successes in battle (not having lost a battle since the initial invasion of Italy in 1806). We met the Polish army outside the city. They had one full stack in the city, and one outside. We were outnumbered two to one, but I'd won with much worse odds than that.
We waited for the Polish to attack, as was the usual tactic, with some cavalry on the flanks to mop up, or help out if things went badly with the infantry.
The Polish joined forces, and this was where I realised my mistake. These were no Prussian conscripts - they were veteraned from multiple wars, and there were thousands of them. Small numbers of Polish artillery began bombarding my centre, and I really started to feel the need for my usual overwhelming artillery support (Usually have 8 units per army). Weakened and cowed, my centre engaged the Polish lines, outnumbered, and sadly outmatched. My cavalry gloriously charged into the Polish rear, but were bit by bit cut off in melee. All this time, the Polish artillery were shelling straight into the melee, killing Frenchman and Pole alike.
All I had was my general, and three reserve units of dragoons.
The Polish had, by this time, spread their vast army across the map, and began sprinting, exhausted, towards my reserve. My general formed a line with his dragoons, and waited for the end. But it didn't come. By some kind of glitch, the Polish stopped moving, but instead waited for me to charge. I dismounted my dragoons and fired on them. That broke the glitch, and they charged across the map once more after my retreating (now mounted once more) dragoons.
My general formed a battle line, and then called the charge at a dense mass of charging Polish (eight or nine units of depleted line infantry).
It was glorious, as the ground thundered under almost 200 hooves.
Spoiler
1.
Half a league, half a league,
Half a league onward,
All in the valley of Death
Rode the six hundred.
"Forward, the Light Brigade!
"Charge for the guns!" he said:
Into the valley of Death
Rode the six hundred.
2.
"Forward, the Light Brigade!"
Was there a man dismay'd?
Not tho' the soldier knew
Someone had blunder'd:
Theirs not to make reply,
Theirs not to reason why,
Theirs but to do and die:
Into the valley of Death
Rode the six hundred.
3.
Cannon to right of them,
Cannon to left of them,
Cannon in front of them
Volley'd and thunder'd;
Storm'd at with shot and shell,
Boldly they rode and well,
Into the jaws of Death,
Into the mouth of Hell
Rode the six hundred.
4.
Flash'd all their sabres bare,
Flash'd as they turn'd in air,
Sabring the gunners there,
Charging an army, while
All the world wonder'd:
Plunged in the battery-smoke
Right thro' the line they broke;
Cossack and Russian
Reel'd from the sabre stroke
Shatter'd and sunder'd.
Then they rode back, but not
Not the six hundred.
5.
Cannon to right of them,
Cannon to left of them,
Cannon behind them
Volley'd and thunder'd;
Storm'd at with shot and shell,
While horse and hero fell,
They that had fought so well
Came thro' the jaws of Death
Back from the mouth of Hell,
All that was left of them,
Left of six hundred.
6.
When can their glory fade?
O the wild charge they made!
All the world wondered.
Honor the charge they made,
Honor the Light Brigade,
Noble six hundred.
They killed another 600 Poles in that charge, but were eventually wiped out or routed. 71 French fled and survived. The rest died that day for their country.
Angered by this defeat, I sent the army in the West against another Prussian army.
We met them in the western are of Silesia. The odds were in our favour, and victory seemed certain. I auto-resolved to find a defeat.
So what's the situation now?
I'm massively conscripting line infantry across Sweden, Prussia, Austria, Russia and Lithuania. The troops are being sent to garrison towns around the perimeter of the Polish power block.
I have about 3,000 line infantry in Switzerland, as an emergency garrison of Paris should the German states turn against me, in addition to a full stack (complete with artillery) in Brussels, guarding me from a possible Dutch betrayal.
I have around 4,000 men stationed around Berlin, infantry, cavalry and limited amounts of artillery.
I am recruiting in every province which can field line infantry within three days' march of the war zone.
I'm feeling a distinct and terrible lack of artillery in the war.
I have the grand army in England, which is mustering to return home. That's about 25,000 men, cavalry and artillery, and about 30 units of rocket batteries.
The Polish are advancing towards Russia. We can hold them for now.
I'm going to quick-march the grand army across. Once they get there, I'll be able to wipe out this rebellion.
Once the Northern rocket corps get there... I sure hope the Polish like fireworks..
