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Author Topic: Much jokes such fun  (Read 13354 times)

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Offline Aiello

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Re: Much jokes such fun
« Reply #45 on: February 28, 2014, 04:08:37 pm »
You've just jump started my US State name pun engine. I've saved most of these from Junior High and never let go of them since.

What did the guy from Augusta say to the waiter?
Spoiler
I'll have the Maine course.
[close]

What did the Spanish woman from New Orleans call her twin daughters?
Spoiler
Louise y Ana
[close]

What did the basketball player from Cheyenne say when he was dunked on by an Asian player?
Spoiler
Why Yao Ming?
[close]

What did the serf from Lake Winnipesaukee say to his master when they received a new package?
Spoiler
New-hemp-sire
[close]

What did the guy from Montpelier name the coldest mountain?
Spoiler
Brrrr-mont
[close]

What did the guy from Cleveland say when he saw his friend on the train?
Spoiler
Oh hi yo!
[close]

What did the Rabbi from Boston feed on when he was an infant?
Spoiler
Massive jew-tits
[close]

What did the guy from Providence call himself when he moved to Reykjavik?
Spoiler
A Rhode-Icelander
[close]



EDIT: Got a couple more for you.

What did the guy from Las Vegas with a Boston accent answer when someone asked if he'd ever been in space?
Spoiler
Nevah, duh.
[close]

What did the guy from Richmond say when he discovered his girlfriend had in intact hymen?
Spoiler
Virgin, yeah
[close]

What did the guy from St. Paul call his new small sized tonic?
Spoiler
Mini-soda
[close]

What did the prostitute from Boise say when she saw another girl working her corner?
Spoiler
Hey I da' ho here!
[close]

What did the jihadist from Birmingham say when he was startled by an explosion?
Spoiler
Allah! *bam* Ahhh-
[close]

What did the guy from Nashville answer when he was asked what 5+5 is?
Spoiler
Ten, ya' see.
[close]

What pageant did the English girl living in Kansas City win back home in England?
Spoiler
Miss Surrey
[close]

Request a state I haven't done and I'll try my best.
« Last Edit: February 28, 2014, 04:26:41 pm by Aiello »
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Offline Handsome

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Re: Much jokes such fun
« Reply #46 on: March 25, 2014, 01:35:56 pm »
I've got this black friend... just kidding.
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AeroNinja

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Re: Much jokes such fun
« Reply #47 on: March 25, 2014, 01:49:29 pm »
A guy walks into a bar and takes a seat. Before he can order a beer, the bowl of pretzels in front of him says "Hey, you're a handsome fellow." The man tries to ignore the bowl of pretzels, and orders a fine Pilsner beer. The bowl of pretzels then says "Ooooh, a pilsner, great choice. You're a smart man." Starting to freak out, the guy says to the bartender "Hey what the hell, this bowl of pretzels keeps saying nice things to me!" Bartender says "Don't worry about it, the pretzels are complimentary."
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Offline kpetschulat

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Re: Much jokes such fun
« Reply #48 on: March 25, 2014, 02:30:39 pm »
GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY Was actually amusing.
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AeroNinja

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Re: Much jokes such fun
« Reply #49 on: March 25, 2014, 02:35:09 pm »
Police: Where do u live?
Me: With my parents.
Police: Where do your parents live?
Me: With Me.
Police: Where do you all live?
Me: Together.
Police: Where is your house?
Me: Next to my neighbors house.
Police: Where is your neighbors house?
Me: You won't believe me if I tell you.
Police: Tell Me!
Me: Next to my house.

Bully - "Hey fat ass. Why you so fat?"
Fat kid - "Because every time I f*ck ya mother she give me a cookie."

girl - baby im wet.
Boy - want a paper towel?
Girl - no, i want more then that ;)
Boy - want 2 paper towels?
Girl - no, baby i want sumthing big and round ;)
Boy - damn you want the whole roll?
« Last Edit: March 25, 2014, 02:36:41 pm by MithrellaS »
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Offline kpetschulat

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Re: Much jokes such fun
« Reply #50 on: March 25, 2014, 02:38:30 pm »
The second and third ones are hilarious.
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AeroNinja

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Re: Much jokes such fun
« Reply #51 on: March 25, 2014, 02:39:46 pm »
Quote from: kpetschulat on March 25, 2014, 02:38:30 pm
The second and third ones are hilarious.
Yea the first one is a bit boring but yea :p


« Last Edit: March 25, 2014, 02:46:32 pm by MithrellaS »
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Offline -~Carson~-

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Re: Much jokes such fun
« Reply #52 on: March 25, 2014, 06:26:32 pm »
Q: Why did the d**k go to the 7-11?
Spoiler
A: To get a slurpee.
[close]
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Offline Beautiful

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Re: Much jokes such fun
« Reply #53 on: April 11, 2014, 07:59:06 pm »
What is Oranges, black, and extremely fun.
Spoiler
A jail bus driving down a hillside
[close]
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Offline Andrew

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Re: Much jokes such fun
« Reply #54 on: April 11, 2014, 08:00:00 pm »
Quote from: Beautiful on April 11, 2014, 07:59:06 pm
What is Oranges, black, and extremely fun.
Spoiler
A jail bus driving down a hillside
[close]
GG WP
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Offline GoldenEagle

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Re: Much jokes such fun
« Reply #55 on: April 11, 2014, 08:18:13 pm »
What is red and has 3 legs?

Spoiler
Nothing, I lied
[close]
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Offline Colonel Howe

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Re: Much jokes such fun
« Reply #56 on: April 11, 2014, 10:32:18 pm »
My name is Father O'Mally

I built this Church with my own hands but do you think anybody would call me "Father O'Mally the Churchbuilder?"

No

I crafted the leather for my Bible's cover but do you think anyone would call me "Father O'Mally the leatherworker?"

No

But fuck one kid...
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Fuck off, Nazi scum

Offline kpetschulat

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Re: Much jokes such fun
« Reply #57 on: April 11, 2014, 10:37:56 pm »
That's terrible... Terribly true!
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Offline Coconut

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Re: Much jokes such fun
« Reply #58 on: April 16, 2014, 05:52:15 am »
What do you call it when Batman skips church? Christian Bail
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Offline kpetschulat

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Re: Much jokes such fun
« Reply #59 on: April 16, 2014, 05:53:35 am »
lawllawllawllawllawllawllawllawllawllawllawllawllawllawllawllawllawllawllawllawllawllawllawllawllawllawllawl

Fuck you.

What do you get when you mix the DNA of a monkey and a crocodile? An imbecile.
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