I kind of agree with you. There are too many rules, especially on the official servers, that prevent people from actually spending time with friends and having fun. There are words that many people use, that they don't mean in the context that the admins think. Example? Sure.
Player gets into a bayonet fight, lag happens, he misses the block.
Player: Oh, come on. That's so gay.
Admin perma-bans him for the use of a "homophobic" (Which is not real, it's homosexual) slur.
Admin: Do not use homophobic slurs on our server. Thanks.
Obviously, the use of the word "gay" was not meant in context that Player meant. And, furthermore... most of these admins just ban, ban, and ban without giving warnings. They expect everyone to go to a forum that most people don't even know exists and read the 100+ rules for these servers that are incredibly strict.
I usually don't mind teamkills, it's just a game. However, the only time i start asking for an admin is when someone consistently teamkills me, persistently calls me derogatory terms (again, I don't mind them ever here and there), trolls and griefs (don't mind it too much), etc.