I have bad and good news fellas.
Identify yourself commander: I am Swift, ex 63 ex 45e ex 71st ex 3eVolt ex AEF ex SoloMidLaner (98.5 overall melee)
Also know as the inventor of the stun chamber and swiftish kick.
63e- #1P4P reg Zen is amazing
45e- I never thought a reg could outmeme 63e, congrats
71st- Sorry I had to dethrone you theodin and jackie in a 1v2 and I earned gaurd easily and smacked Achilles in 4 ft7s (slight work)
AEF- little less gay than i thought
SoloMidLaner- Im a top 100 dota player not may ppl know I solo mid with either earthbreaker or monkeyking
This is not a goodbye but, rather a see you soon. I was very active recently trying to erradicate NA of poor meleers including Theodin (control freak only rated 82 melee compared to my 98.5), Suns (datesa a fat emo chick and is a beaner), and Zaqaz( claims to have 13 inch dick and is Asian also claims to have been raped by two black women in NYC park in broad daylight) anyways....I will miss the memes and I will be back soon dont worry boys, girls, loved ones, family, friends, e-girlfriend(s).
Ive enjoyed my time as a poineer troll, singlehandedly taking down the 63e and spawning and breeding many trolls including Goku, Jaiden, Pugly (r.i.p. sweetheart, u memed urself with autoblock), Saint, ramelon (yeah, believe it I turned him inside out once he felt this BBC), Steven (hahaha), tizoc, and Bill (top groupfighter NA) I could go on for DAYS....Ive inspired many trolls and fought along some great trolls including SintraBean, PadreSuns, Dante, MATT just a few big names sorry for anyone ive excluded. Ive beaten everyone in ft7 except Jackie bcuz hes a very bad word that I cannot say, Maple, Theodin, Zzehth (have fun at the club great teacher), RussianFury (he lies and said i didnt bcuz he has curly ginger hair and likes men 100%), Dante (top deulist), and MATT (top duelist), Achilles (4 times).
My work is almost finished but not until I do something no troll has done, expose myself. Nobody is safe not even me from my wrath and great melee. My first melee teacher was PadreSuns in 63e, soon years later literally years. We were in 45e and I dueled him for CplFoP beating him 3 times and losing 2. Off the record I have beat him 17-5 ft7s. The pupil has become the student, checkmate, bingo. I fucked you so damn good and now youre forever my bitch, congratulations! Its an honor to be Swifts bitch. Furthermore, I am not 5'0 195 lbs and 15% body fat. I am 4'9 and 200 lbs with 26% body fat, my low center of gravity allows me to deliver the hardest low kicks to my oppenent eventually crippling them util I go for the finish. Furthermore, my recent style is heavily influenced by Godfried almost copy and paste. Next, Its true I am half black half spanish by law you cannot call me a n***** only a n**. Nextly, the moment I dedicated my life to this game was when I got 7-0 by Dante in front of everyone I was so embarrased I cried a bucket o tears. Now look at me, top duelist NA and EU, respected and feared by all. Furthermore, I sent Ruby a dick pic and she liked black dick so much she blcoked me from SnapChat. Furthermore, Surena is a homosexual. I'm honored that Ive inspired so many people to play this game and troll the proper and effective way.
I am risking my life sending this message if my mom comes in my ass will be beat with a black belt. Please send your prayers. 63e will never be the same after I anally fucked them so hard the head came out the mouth. Finally, sorry I cannot obviously fucking name and explain everyone but If you want you can message me and ill post sumn real sweet mmk. Carry on the legacy, happy trolling.
